Saturday, April 12, 2008

Prom...

I know that this post isn't necessarily all that relevant to what this blog is necessarily intended for, but I couldn't pass up its relevance.

Everyone knows that prom is just around the corner--tomorrow to be exact. With the school assembly that we seniors recently had, I felt that everyone could enjoy this article.

Here are some tips from the Onion on how to make your Prom "Unforgettable."

Prom-Planning Tips

April 2, 2003 | Issue 39•12

Prom season is just around the corner. Here are some tips to help make your prom night unforgettable:


  • The prom is a magical experience, a chance to do such grown-up things as get all dressed up, drink nine Smirnoff Ices, vomit in a limo, and pass out in Mom's azalea bushes.
  • The theme is one of the most important elements of a prom. Choose carefully between "Tropical Paradise" and "Stepping Out In Style."
  • Don't forget the corsage! Fresh flowers are necessary to mask the smell of sweat and foot odor in your school's dank, poorly ventilated gym.
  • Try to plan ahead, so you are not more than two or three months pregnant for your prom.
  • Next to a bridesmaid dress, a prom dress is the most important dress you will ever wear.
  • If you were not asked to prom, you can still have fun by putting on a dress, buying a taco-salad party platter from the local Pic-N-Save, and dancing in your bedroom as a portable radio plays the latest Top 40 hits.
  • This will be the biggest night of your life if you happen to die in the next few weeks.
(This post has been censored)



4 comments:

Genevieve Lau said...

The Onion makes a point once again...in a not so serious way. But seriously, I feel as though some people do see prom night as an excuse to drink and have sex...that's the most bothersome thing about prom to me. It's about having fun, looking great and seeing your friends happy not about "passing out in your mom's azalea bushes.:

benji said...

...and now, thanks to this article, I know what a "gorilla salad" is. Thanks Derek.

Derek Lee said...

Benji, that was the part that was censored. I don't want any credit for that knowledge.

Ryan Landis said...

The Onion is always pretty funny, but I do not find this one as that funny. Maybe it is just be, but "ballas" get to have parties like this all the time in the future!

:)